Another Crazy Trade Idea

As self-appointed Internet GM of the KC Royals we here at the PBR like nothing more than to come up with bat-shit crazy trade ideas. If we're right, we get ammunition for future posts which affirm our superior GM-ing skills, and if wer're wrong we can simply delete the post. It's a win-win scenario. Last year we proposed that the Royals trade for Carlos Zambrano. So far this is working out pretty well for the Marlins; 1.87 ERA, 39 SO and one more complete game than KC's entire staff. We don't want to say we told you so because we knew the likelihood of pulling it off was low. If there is one player who is the complete opposite of Dayton Moore's team philosophy, it might be Big Z. Also, we can only assume that Big Z would have exercised his no-trade clause as soon as he heard the word Kansas. Right now the Marlins look pretty good for making this trade, but it's also pretty obvious that Ned Yost is not Ozzie Guillen. He's not from Venezuela. And he probably does not have one thing in common with Zambrano, so it may have completely backfired here in KC. However, we've got a new one which might just work... let's get Josh Beckett. Admit it, you're intrigued. Let me tell you why it makes sense:

For the Royals, it would be Dayton's most emphatic statement yet that he wants to win NOW. It's a perfect hybrid trade which minimizes both money and prospects. The Royals don't have to give up one of their big two (Meyers & Odorizzi) and they don't have to shell out $80 mil on the free agent market. Pick a mid tier Royals' prospect and throw in a bullpen arm, it shouldn't take a boatload to get two years of an aging Beckett. The Royals should also be willing to pick-up a good chunk of the tab for Beckett's remaining salary given that they have money this season and don't have anything earmarked for the next two seasons (Joakim basically just gave us back $8mil for next season). Obviously there is a lot of down side, but there's always going to be some when it involves pitchers (see the Royals). Look, Josh Beckett could develop a serious BBQ addiction and eat Oklahoma Joe's for breakfast, Gates for lunch, Arthur Bryant's for dinner and not fit into his uniform by seasons end. His arm could fall off by August. But he also could still be an Ace. Dayton can make the case that he's a "competitor" with "playoff experience" who can "help the young staff" and therefore internally justify the move. Nobody in KC cares about his past slip-ups and locals would praise the move.

For Boston, they can finally free themselves of the epic collapse of last year. At the same time they make a minor league restocking move and shed some much needed payroll. He is HATED in Boston right now and the new regime should be motivated to make their own mark on the team. The relationship has become toxic and Boston could conceivably finish fifth in their division this year. Beckett is the only thing they can trade which satisfies all needs: appeasement of the fan-base, cash flow freedom and immediate bullpen help to along with a future prospect.

For Beckett, he can flee Boston (again where he is hated) to join the Royals staff as its ace and possible savior. It's a change of scenery from being busted over dietary preferences and free time activities. Josh is from Texas, Ned thinks he's from Texas, so they should get along. Kauffman is more of a pitcher's park and maybe Josh can get away with a few more long flyouts than he does in Fenway. Our players would actually respect him instead of treating him like a scar. In KC he can warm-up with 18 holes on the day he's starting, then eat a half slab with a tall boy while he's warming up in the pen. KC fans haven't been spoiled by a couple of World Series rings and are just looking for anything positive.

Everyone wins, Dayton Moore meet Ben Cherington. Make this happen.